Our mind can be split into the conscious and the sub-conscious. It is the sub-conscious mind that does all those daily tasks automatically, like knowing how to clean our teeth, cook eggs, drive a car or walk up a hill. This accounts for about 95% of our thoughts.
The conscious mind is the one you have to use to do new tasks or anything complicated. If you are following a new recipe, you will be using your conscious mind as you weigh and measure the ingredients, and follow the instructions step by step. When you have made that dish several times, it becomes sub-conscious and, if you do it often, you will just know what ingredients you need, and how much to put in and how to make the dish.
If you are a car driver, cast your mind back to the first time you tried to drive. There is SO much to remember, all at the same time. I recall being totally overwhelmed with the prospect of having to steer around a roundabout whilst indicating, changing gear, accelerating and checking in every direction for other cars. The chances are, unless you are in a new place, driving is now second nature and you probably often drive from A to B without remembering anything about the journey as you plan your shopping list, review last night’s TV, wonder what to do at the weekend and fret about an issue at work.
In the usual course of things, day to day life is largely run on auto-pilot. And then we have these CoVi Days. And everything is different. Chances are you are at home most of the time. Perhaps with all the family around you, when usually they are out at school/work/college etc. Trips to the supermarket are no longer easy – you have to keep your distance, and check that you have collected what you need as you go around as there is no turning back.
Then there are the rules, or the lack of rules, or deciding how to interpret the rules. You may have to make a LOT of decisions about things you never considered before, such as where is an appropriate place to walk the dog, or go for a run. And what to do if you meet someone else when you are in this place. And what should you take? Do you need gloves, a mask, hand sanitiser?
And there is the fear. Even if you are not fearful for your own health, you may feel concern for the health of loved ones, or those you know who are more vulnerable. And if this doesn’t fill you with fear, the fear of others can be exhausting, as well as the incessant talk on every single means of communication about nothing but CoVid, or some aspects of it. And then there is the judgement of others. And the eternal questioning of whether you have chosen the right path.
All of these things use your conscious mind, which is currently working far harder than usual, trying to process the constant onslaught of new information.
THIS is why you feel so tired.
Can you remember the first day in a new job? Or arriving in a new city for a trip? The variety of newness in these situations is offset with the natural adrenalin rush of being there. After 8 or 10 weeks in Lockdown, the adrenalin has long since subsided, except, perhaps, for the occasional burst when something good or bad happens.
Adjusting to these times is tiring. That is ok. Give yourself space, time and rest and know that it isn’t forever.